Remember that hint I gave on Monday about my upcoming series of posts, fresh out of the Shire like Old Toby? Today marks the beginning of that series, with the masterfully epic and painfully unoriginal title “Pop Culture Q&A…”

Despite the lackluster description, my hope is that the content will provide heaps more entertainment. How is this going to work?

• Each Thursday, the next post will make its debut
• Every post will feature a different character from science fiction or fantasy
• I’ll pose a number (it will vary week by week) of questions related to pop culture, which the characters will answer
• I won’t always ask the same questions…yay for surprises 😉
• I have no idea how long the series will last…yay for more surprises (mwahahahaha)

Those are the basics. Let’s get started, and what better character to kick off this series than that great wandering wizard and pipe-smoking sage, Gandalf?

Pop Culture Q&A with Gandalf

Me: Welcome, Gandalf. Thank you for agreeing to this Q&A session. I hope you’re ready to answer some questions about pop culture.

Gandalf: Agree to giving answers to questions? Is that what I did? I was under the impression you were buying me a meal.

Me: Umm…I am. But I’m going to ask questions, too. I hope that’s all right?

Gandalf (raising his eyebrows): That depends on the nature of the questions.

Me: Oh, no worries. I’m sure you’ll enjoy them.

Gandalf: Then begin. A wizard’s time is never his own. I must be other places ere long.

Me: Okay, I’ll try to keep it short. First question: Do you prefer DC Comics or Marvel?

Gandalf: What nonsense is this? Both are equally inferior. They lack magic, gray beards, pointy hats, a groveling creature driven by insatiable greed. Unless you count Loki in that regard.

Me: You have a point, I suppose. That leads right into my next question about favorite books. Given your answer, I’m assuming you’d choose Harry Potter?

Gandalf (after snorting): Harry Potter? Why on earth would I want to spend my time reading books whose main character is a hairy potter? Utter babble. Give me a tale of sacrifice, loyalty, good and evil. That, young lad, is a tale worth losing oneself in.

Me: Okaaay. It’s clear you misunderstood me.

Gandalf: Do you presume to offend me by offering insulting words regarding my intelligence?

Me: Of course not, Gandalf. I beg your pardon if that’s the meaning I implied. Moving along, would you rather attend a rock concert or be invited to the exclusive premier of the next major movie?

Gandalf: Naturally, I’d choose the rock concert.

Me: Honestly, that surprises me. You enjoy music, then?

Gandalf: Anyone who doesn’t enjoy music must have the unfortunate fate of being born with a heart of stone.

Me: Who’s your favorite pop artist or band?

Gandalf: AC/DC.

Me: Wow. I find that…interesting. Dare I ask what your favorite song is? Actually, no, pretend I never said that. Let’s hear about any other favorite bands or songs instead.

Gandalf: I’m not “up to speed” as you might say these days, on the popular artists and songs, but I’m quite fond of Enya.

Me: Right. Something soothing after getting worked up listening to AC/DC. *shrug* If that’s your thing. Next question: do you ship Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston?

Gandalf: Does a man of wisdom embark on a journey when his boots are worn thin?

Me: I’ll take that as a “no.” Technically, you could argue that hobbits, since they don’t wear boots—er, never mind. Since I mentioned Tom, this is the perfect time to ask, who’s your favorite actor?

Gandalf: Michael Gambon. He’s an unusually intelligent fellow, quite the personality, too. And I approve of his beard and overall appearance. He reminds me of myself in many ways.

Me (acting surprised): Really? I wonder why…

Gandalf: Is this “session,” as you call it, nearly at an end? I’m in need of sustenance, and other duties demand my attention.

Me: Yes. Only a few more question. I promise. If you could marry the pop culture star of your choice, who would you pick?

Gandalf: None of them. I have no time for such fluff and foolery. They would drive me to the verge of insanity with their shenanigans and I would be an equal nuisance to them, with my pipe habits, attire, and general gruffness.

Me: Not the answer I was looking for, but fair enough. Do you follow any TV shows?

Gandalf: In my busy schedule I barely have time. But, I confess, there’s one show I simply cannot tear myself away from. Bilbo hooked me on it. It follows the life of an eccentric English detective and his faithful friend. My only complaint is that its production is slower than a council of Ents attempting to reach a decision.

Me: Ah, Sherlock. Love that show, and yes, I agree about the slowness. Gives the Ents a run for their money. Anyway, looks like lunch has arrived. Last question for you, Gandalf. If you were running for president, which Avenger would you pick as your running mate?

Gandalf: Tony Stark, without hesitation. I find his humor enjoyable, his mind quick and clever, and his suits highly fascinating and endlessly useful.

Me: Great answer. Thanks for spending some time with us today, Gandalf. By the way, #GandalfandStark is totally gonna take social media by storm.

Gandalf (sniffing the food): Hmm, yes. I suppose. *looking at me* What is this exotic delicacy? I admit in all my travels I’ve never come across it.

Me: I thought I’d introduce you to shawarma.

What pop culture question would you ask Gandalf? I’d love to hear your answers.