Attention, citizens of Entertainment Land. This is a public service announcement.
It has come to the attention of the Happy Heart Health Board that over the past several years, a new and highly contagious disease has spread rapidly through the land. Known as Marvel Geek Disease (MGD), it is creating an unprecedented stir, one of which everyone needs to be aware.
For the benefit of all concerned, the Board has deemed it a necessary public service to divulge the symptoms of MGD. If more than half of these apply to you, it’s likely you have been infected with MGD and SHOULD NOT seek medical assistance. Repeat: DO NOT try to cure yourself of this disease.
For personal happiness, MGD is best left untreated, and in fact, additional exposure will only lead to greater pleasure.
Here now, as listed by the Board, are twenty-one signs that you might be infected with the Marvel Geek Disease:
(Symptoms may vary and manifest different strengths on a case-by-case basis)
- You’ve seen every Marvel movie produced in the past five years
- You can name the Avengers team as it stands after Age of Ultron
- You own at least one piece of Marvel merchandise
- You speculate with friends on the content of future movies and examine the good, the bad, and the ugly from past movies
- You’re determined to stay alive at least until Infinity War 2 comes out
- You will legitimately cry when (not if!) Captain America or Thor dies
- Despite the popularity of the movies, your loyalties extend to the comics
- You’re dying to know why Loki was sitting on Odin’s throne and what scheme he has up his sleeve. No, seriously—DYING
- You’re elated that Spidey has officially entered the MCU
- You know what MCU stands for
- You could talk about your love and passion for everything Marvel straight through the night
- Sometimes you wonder if you have a deeper attachment to the characters than to your real friends
- Any time you see a funny post about the characters or movies on Facebook, you share it with the rest of your infected (I mean geeky) friends
- You’ve been in discussions debating the pros and cons of certain Marvel standbys defying death
- You know Lola is a what, not a who
- When you meet another Marvel lover, it’s as if you’ve found a BFF
- You wish you could plant a baby Groot in your backyard
- You were thrilled when you heard Agent Carter would be returning for a second season
- You want a computer as smart and friendly as J.A.R.V.I.S
- Not a single Stan Lee cameo has escaped your notice
- You know never to leave the theater when the credits begin to roll
Again, the Board recommends that for the best possible outcome, treatment of these symptoms should be avoided.
Are you infected with Marvel Geek Disease? Which symptom is the strongest? I would love to hear your thoughts.
